On the Road Again…

Off we go...

Today I’m catching a flight from Puerto Rico back to California, via New Jersey.  Total travel time: 14.5 hours (including the four hour layover in Jersey).  Yuuuck!  I’m already running late and my colleague is threatening to leave me at the hotel, so I don’t have much time to write.  Here’s a quick update:  Yankees win the World Series, I ate my fifth bowl of mofongo last night, and although I visited La Gran Via de Aguada one last time, I didn’t have a chance to shoot.  More on that later.  For now, it’s time to go.  I wave my last goodbyes to the Enchanted Isle, and I’m flying off, into to the wild blue yonder.….

Scouting Report

Before leaving California for Puerto Rico, I did a little homework.  I contacted Harold Acosta, president of the Puerto Rican Billiard Federation, to ask his advice on playing billiards on the western coast of Puerto Rico.  Harold provided a wealth of information, including recommendations on a couple places that I should visit while on the island.  The first place he recommended I check out was Eggy’s Pool Room in Aguadilla, since it is located on State Road 2 only a few miles from where I am working.  The second location to check out is La Gran Via de Aguada, located at the intersection of State Roads 416 and 417 in Aguada, several miles south of Aguadilla.

After I arrived in Puerto Rico, one of the first things I did was drive around and check out the locations Harold recommended.   I prefer to do scouting runs during my lunch break, as no serious pool player would be caught dead in a pool room during lunch time.  Why?  Because he probably just got to bed after shooting pool all night!  (Notice I said “he”?  I use the male gender simply because over 90% of all pool players are male.  Why is that?  I haven’t the faintest clue.  When it comes to pool, males have absolutely no physical or mental advantage over females.  It’s a mystery to me, but alas, I digress.)  First on my agenda was Eggy’s Pool Room.  Eggy’s is a quaint little place on State Road 2.  The room was open for business when I arrived, but it was completely empty except for a woman behind the counter.  After entering the room and saying, “Hola,” I walked around to check out the equipment.  The condition of the tables and house cue sticks will tell you a lot about a room; whether it is a serious players room, or just a place where people like to get drunk and start fights.  The room had seven eight-foot coin operated pool tables in good to fair condition and a snack counter with chips, drinks, etc.  The lady behind the counter was very nice.  Even though she spoke absolutely no English, and I spoke almost no Spanish, we were still able to communicate the key information of interest, such as when they open, when they close, how much the tables cost, and when most people show up to play.  As I walked around the room, I paid special attention to the wall decorations.  You can learn an awful lot about a place just by looking at what the owners and patrons place on the walls; it indicates what they value.  It’s interesting how much information you can pick up.  On one wall, I found a huge display board that was filled with pictures of patrons smiling, laughing, hugging, and having a great time.  I could tell this place had a good natured clientele, mostly aged 20-35.  My synopsis was that this is a great place to meet, greet, and court members of the opposite sex while downing a few cervezas and acting cool with a group of your friends.  In my book, this place gets an “A” for socialization and an “F” for serious play.  Not my kind of place…LOL!!  After wandering around for ten minutes, I said my goodbyes, got back in my car, and peeled out of the parking lot….eeeeerrrrrrrrggggggg!  On to my next stop, La Gran Via de Aguada.

La Gran Via de Aguada (I still haven’t deciphered the meaning of the name) is the type of place your mother warned you about.  When I pulled into the parking lot, my hands instinctively shot out for the door locks just to make sure they were still engaged.  Just take a look at the outside of this place.  What is that on the bottom floor anyway, an auto body shop?  This place looks like the type of establishment where you rent rooms by the hour.  Hummmm… I hate to admit it, but from a pool playing perspective, this place looks promising!  I muster up some courage, then jump from the car and quickly bound up the stairway.  I’m moving as fast as possible to avoid any potential stray bullets from the neighborhood.  After successfully traversing an open doorway, I step into the room and appear to have been transported to some alternate reality.  On the inside, the place is actually quite nice.  The room has eight eight-foot coin operated pool tables in good condition, and five nine-foot tournament tables also in good condition.  There’s even a very large bar area with adequate seating in the back.  I make eye contact with a gentleman who is cleaning the floor, but he doesn’t speak any English, and I…well, you know.  I pulled out my camera and the gentleman smiled and waved me on.  After a quick five minute tour, I’ve discerned that this is a place for serious players.  Yes, there are some instances of the standard bad pool room art, but there’s also something of interest on the walls.  There are photos of some professional players here, and the bar seating is well designed to allow patrons in the bar to observe matches at the tables.  Yes, someone here has a good knowledge and appreciation for the game, and where there is one, there are usually others.  Yes, this is the place I want to come back to.  I make a move to leave, but decide to stop at the doorway and take one last look.  I move my head slowly from side to side, taking in the ambiance.  As I make eye contact with the cleaning guy again, I slide my sunglasses down over my eyes, and say in a monotone voice, “I’ll be back!”

Shooting Pool in a Puerto Rican Zoo – Part 2

Transmitter Tower

(If you didn’t read my post from yesterday, please read it first!)  After arriving at the radio station, Alan led me inside the building and gave me the grand tour.  I met the Disc Jockey on duty and several of the support staff, and even got to walk through the transmitter room to see all the electronics that are involved in making a radio station run.  It was really interesting to me as I had no idea what the inside of a radio station looked like.  After the tour, we walked out and Alan explained to me that he lives in the second floor of the building, which makes his work commute about 20feet.  As we rounded the building, and he said,

Newborn Sheep

“David’s going upstairs to prepare the billiard table.  Let’s take this golf cart, and I’ll give you a tour of the farm.” We get into the cart, and off we go.  He drove us around for 30 minutes or so, touring the orchards and the stables.  There were several fenced off areas with horses, dwarf horses, donkeys, and dwarf hogs, and several large metal enclosures containing various types of animals.  There were also lots of animals running around free, including chickens, guinea fowls, an occasional tarantula and several incredibly fast bright green iguanas (couldn’t get a picture, they were so fast!).  The orchard contained exotic trees I’d never even heard of, and I saw more Mango trees than I’ve ever seen in my life.  And yes, there was even a full gown monkey in a huge cage (30 ft wide, 20 ft high)!

Exotic Tree

(I have a video of the monkey moving around in his cage, but I’m having trouble loading the video.  Hopefully I’ll post it soon.)

Tarantula!

After a tour of the farm, we went to his house, grabbed a few cervezas, and walked out onto the veranda.  The veranda was about 20 feet above the ground level, with three sides open to the elements that allowed you to look out over the farm.  The floor was made of shiny white marble.  A white cotton hammock was hung on the left side of the deck, and a pool table was located to the right.  Strategically located between the two was a wet bar that had been built into the wall of the building.  The view was incredible; the veranda looks out over a grove of mango trees, and the monkey cage sits just off to the right hand side.  Directly in front of the veranda is a large concrete enclosure with  wrought iron walls that once held a pair of lions, but now houses a pair of dwarf hogs.

Alan Shooting

David had prepared the pool table by removing the cover and getting the equipment ready to go.  As the guest of honor, I was given the opening break, and we were off and running!  Alan, David, and I ended up spending the rest of the afternoon shooting pool, enjoying a few cervezas, and shooting the breeze.  We had a blast.

David Shooting

What’s the moral of this story?  I don’t know.  Maybe just this: Do what you love to do and see what happens.  And the next time you meet a guy in a bar who tells you his sheep just had a baby, he owns a monkey, and he keeps several dozen wild animals at his house, he just might be telling the truth!

Shooting Pool in a Puerto Rican Zoo – Part 1

Yesterday, I drove to the Ocean Front Hotel & Restaurant for lunch. I was sitting at the outside bar eating a bowl of mofongo and nursing a cerveza, when two guys walk up and sit next to me. The guy closest to me, Alan, introduces himself and his friend David. Alan asks what I’m eating.  “Chicken mofongo,” I respond.  “Is it good?”  “Yes, very good.” The conversation moves on from there. To summarize, Alan owns a local radio station in Isabella, and other radio stations in Cabo Rojo and San Juan. He drives to this restaurant every Saturday for lunch.  After a few minutes of conversation, David’s phone rings. There’s a short excited exchange in Spanish, then Alan turns to me and asks, “Can you understand Spanish?” I tell him no.  He responds, “Ah, my friend is telling me that my sheep just had a kid!”  “Your sheep?”  “Yes, I am a farmer.  I grow fruits and vegetables, and I have some animals at my house.” He goes on to share that in addition to the sheep, he has a veritable zoo, filled with “…horses, donkeys, guinea fowl, chickens, pigeons, dogs, dwarf horses, dwarf hogs, emus, rabbits, iguanas, and a pet monkey.”  “A monkey?” “Yes, a monkey.”  “How’d you get a monkey?” He told me that many years ago he bought a couple of monkeys from a zoo that was closing, and after he got them they had a baby. The original monkeys had died, but the baby monkey survived. Then he paused and added, “I used to have a pair of lions at my house too, but they died a few years ago.” (Lions at your house?  Yeah, right! )

After finishing lunch and paying the check, and got up from the bar to head back to my car. After all, I needed to drive to Aguada to shoot pool all night.  Looking for a way to tactfully disengage from the conversation and exit the restaurant, I decided on a whim to ask the guy if he knew anything about pool, and if he knew of any places to play in the area. He smiled and nodded his head, “Yes.  So…you play pool huh?  Where are you going to play?”  “Probably in Aguada,” I responded noncommittally. “Oh, no, you shouldn’t play there. If they see a gringo come in, it would not be good for you. You should play up the road here.” He lifted his arm and vaguely pointed to a mountain rising out of the rain forest. I followed his gaze, and asked, “So, there’s a place to play up there?”  “Yes.”  “Oh yeah?  Where is it?”  “At my house.” He then added, “Now I’m going to eat a piece of chocolate cake for dessert. Why don’t you stick around and I’ll take you there. You can see my zoo, and then we can shoot some pool.  Would you like to go?” As he ate his cake, I had visions of Neverland Ranch and Deliverance dancing in my head. I did, however, remember that over the preceding forty-five minutes, every single person who had entered the restaurant had stopped by to say hello to him and shake his hand, so it was obvious to me that he was a well respected member of the community. I responded, “So, I can see a zoo and shoot some pool at your house?”  “Yes, that is right.” After a couple seconds of hesitation, I replied, “Hummm, OK.”

LOL!! You just can’t make this stuff up!! So Alan and David get into their Chevy Avalanche, and I follow in my rental.

Just as I think to myself, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?”, they immediately swerve off the main road and I follow, careening at high speed down a very narrow road leading into the rain forest. After a minute or two, there’s a sharp turn in the road, and suddenly we burst through the tree canopy and are driving up a road that has literally been carved out of a sheer rock faced cliff. The road seems better suited for bicycles. After climbing two or three hundred feet, we reach the plateau, turn right, and pass through a very small town. In five minutes, we’re pulling into the parking lot of a building that looks like a concrete bunker with a chain link fence around it, upon which hangs a sign: “Puerto Rico 740 AM”. Alan jumps out of his truck and motions for me to follow.  “Ever been inside a radio station?”

Sorry to cut the story short, but it’s very late here and I need to get some rest so I can head out early tomorrow. Come back tomorrow evening for the rest of this story, along with lots of pictures and videos!

Habla Español?

It’s Saturday, the work week is over and the weather is nice here in Puerto Rico.  Time for me to head out into the wild blue yonder.  I plan to spend most of the day practicing my fundamentals and most of the night visiting local pool halls in the area to see if I can find a good game.  To say that my Spanish language skills are limited would be a huge understatement.  As such, I’ve invested a little time this morning to learn some key phrases that may be useful to me, such as:

Yo no hablo español.  (I don’t speak Spanish.)

Quiere jugar?  (Want to play?)

Cuánto dinero?  (How much money?)

I don’t anticipate running into any trouble, but if things get a little unfriendly, I may find the following phrase useful:

Puedo comprar le yo una cerveza mi amigo? (Can I buy you a beer my friend?)

If that doesn’t diffuse the tension, maybe this will:

Puedo comprar le yo dos cervezas mi amigo?  (Can I buy you two beers my friend?)

If things get REALLY nasty, I may need to use the following phrase as a last resort:

Spanish:  No tan es trastornado, yo le pagaré! Necesito para ir al cuarto de baño, pero seré inmediatamente. Aquí, usted puede tener mi palo de indicación como colateral.

English translation: Don’t get so upset, I will pay you!  I need to go to the bathroom, but I’ll be right back.  Here, you can hold my cue stick as collateral.

Rule number one of playing pool on the road:  Always make sure the bathrooms have windows that are large enough to crawl out of!    Well, I’m off to find some adventure.  Does going solo mean that I’ve gone loco?  If anything interesting happens, I’ll let you know.